“How do you do it?” I get this question a lot, and honestly depending on the day I answer it differently every time.
My youngest, Jovee was born on Christmas. Cypress was two and a half and Sparrow was one and a half. Needless to say it has been a LOOONG winter. We’ve encountered days of the tv blaring in the background for more hours than I care to admit, severe cabin fever after bouts with the flu, and so so so much bickering. Days where my phone is glued to my hand begging me to escape this reality. When I think about those details of my life I get so frustrated and feel as if I’m failing my family as a mother and a wife. I want desperately to get outside and take my children places and give them experiences. I grieve the life that I have dreamed up for them in my own mind and with the help of all the comparisons I’ve made. On those days when someone asks me how I do it; three, two and under is more than I can stand to bare.
Sparrow with the flu.
Then there are the mountain top type days. I listen from my couch as my oldest two giggle and laugh from their boat shaped toy box as Jovee swings peacefully across the living room from me. After changing Sparrow she whispers thank you mama in that raspy, sweet voice of hers. We lay on the bed and Cypress let’s me cradle him in my arms as we sing wheels on the bus. I stop to let him fill in every other line and as I’m looking into his eyes I see my husband Colby. Bed time is complete. Jovee squirms around for the last time in the bassinet and we exhale a tired breath. Colby and I collapse into the mountain of pillows and we lay there and tell stories of each baby. We laugh and talk about how much we love them so much it hurts. We kiss each other and sleep falls over us. When I think about these details. I’m winning at motherhood. I’m loving every second. My husband and my babies are loved. When that same question comes up I answer with everything in me, “I love my life and I wouldn’t change a thing.” No comparisons to steal away what I have. No disgruntled attitude to take away the joy that can be had.
Cypress and Sparrow playing cars together at their table.
Jovee being sweet.
Such is life. The mountains and the valleys. The bad with the good. The losing and the winning. I’m still wife and mama either way, and this is my life. I keep my nose to the ground and put in the work investing and loving my people on the good and the bad days. I lower my expectations again and again filtering what I think and what the world tells me my life should look like through God’s word and transform my mind and heart to believe truth. I suppress that voice in my head that screams I’m not doing it right and shut down the comparison game. I alter my answer to the frequently asked question and change it based on where I am and allow my struggles and victories to be transparent so that other people can be encouraged through my life. That’s how I do it. That’s how I survive three, two and under.
As always thanks for reading ❤️